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Wednesday, March 4th, 2009

(rock the cock)

Subject:pretty fly for a white girl.
Time:10:50 am.
Things are going amazingly well in my life.

Last night I got quite tipsy with Alonzo and my cousin and ended up singing the last verse of "you oughta know" with her during karaoke. I never thought I'd be drunk enough to do karaoke but 3 16oz bud lights, 2 scorpion bowls for 1, most of the scorpion bowl for 2 plus the bacardi 151 in just one sip did it for me. Alonzo should feel special ahah.

Speaking of him, looks like he'll be kickin' it in MA a couple more months to get on his feet more before he makes the move to FL. I'm not-so-secretly happy about that.

I also found out yesterday that I'm going to be an "auntie". My girl Becks is preggers, she's due in November. I'm kind of hoping for a girl heheh.



Now if the warm weather would just start coming on the regular it would complete me.

Wednesday, February 25th, 2009

(rock the cock)

Subject:fiendin' for warm weather.
Time:10:42 am.
Mood: energetic.
I can't believe that February is almost over. The sickness has gotten everyone this year..I caught a stomach virus the first week, and last Thursday was diagnosed with scarlet fever. Who the fuck gets that, seriously. I'm finally feeling back to normal as of last night and spent it with my lovah. Can't believe he's out of here in less than a month now.

Mikey's out of here in 2 weeks which is crazy too. I'm gonna miss those boys like mad but hey it gives me an excuse to hit Florida.

Gram's lambectomy went well but they were unable to get all the cancer so now she has to go back for another operation. It's getting to the point where she can't live on her own as well so we need to figure out what's to be done about that because I don't trust my aunt to take care of her worth a damn.

After this last serious illness I'm itching to get to "living". I just want nice weather so I can be outside as much as possible, and if I'm feeling up to it on Saturday I want to get back to the gym. I haven't been in 2 weeks on account of the creeping death and all haha. I'm just looking around at everything and am super grateful to be out of the house and seeing friends again.

I'm still saving up money & actually got a random check in the mail that was a nice addition to that. I haven't yet set a budget for myself but it's hard to do when I'm going out a lot with Mikey to get in as much time before he leaves. After that dies down it'll be easier to gauge how much I'm really spending.

I think I'll post a loong overdue survey up in this biatch.

xoxox

Tuesday, January 27th, 2009

(rock the cock)

Subject:HELLOOOO 2009.
Time:1:48 pm.
Mood: energetic.
For Christmas I got a bunch of awesome things including a badass iron fist hoodie, Tomtom GPS, and a new camera battery. Unfortunately since it's been since June my camera charger has been misplaced so I still haven't been able to use it. oops.


I dare say 2009 has already been way better than any previous years. Bebe had her surgery the 30th of December and has been feeling great ever since, plus she's lost weight and is happy about that. I like seeing her happy and healthy so s'all good.

NYE I had dinner with her, Mark, Nick & Cailyn. then I went home to change and watch some Twilight Zone / finish the wine in the fridge. Then I hit up the packie and headed to Lydia & Derek's for a while, and ended the night at Morgan's. Had a midnight kiss..first one since I dated Paul 3 years ago, and I wasn't even expecting to. Dan's a cutie.
Got home around 2:30/ 3.

I'm still working at Iris and still loving it. Working with Bebe is the best, we lift each others spirits and keep the sanity on a daily basis. Plus we keep it fresh up in heah. Had our work xmas party on the 8th of January (was postponed on account of snow) and it was great. Took place at F1 Boston so I raced and did pretty well, then had food and yankee swap and finished the day with a bunch of us playing pool.

Mostly I've been spending mad time with my homey Mikey as he's out of here for basic on March 11th. Going to see him sworn in and such on that day. Then March 20th Alonzo's out of here too so been getting the usual amount of time with my lovah as well, dinner and Nip // Tuck with him tonight in fact.

Surprisingly I've gotten a better grasp on my finances. Been taking advantage of the overtime offered at work and trying to cut down on some spending. It hasn't been a lot of cutting down because I've been out every weekend drinking with homey and living it up before he leaves. But still...been writing down everything I spend so I can hopefully set up a budget next month.

Gram's had one of two surgeries..the pacemaker was moved from her left to right side. Next is to do the lambectomy and remove the tumor..then she has radiation therapy for who knows how long. She's been fine although her alzheimer's is getting worse daily. I love her and it kills me but I'm strong enough to handle it.

I started on anxiety meds the 1st and I have to say I think they're working. I'm not having near panic / anxiety attacks, I've had my breathing under control, and have just felt more positive than I have in months.

This was a long ass update, hope to have photos posted soon when I'm not on the work computer. All is going great and I can't wait to see what the future holds.

xoxox

Wednesday, December 17th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:been a loong time journal.
Time:10:17 am.
Mood: contemplative.
I don't even remember when I updated last but I know it was a long time ago. I still love my job, and the people at it. Working with one of my best friends is so badass you don't even know. Plus I'm great at what I do and it keeps me busy. I am however going to looking to start a second job in January so I've enlisted the help of the staffing agency that found my current job for me and hopefully we'll be able to find something. I've made a huge dent in the amount that I owe my parents, and if I get a second job should be able to accomplish my goal of moving out on my own within the next year.

Speaking of moving. All of my close friends are more or less. My other best girl Leah is going to PA the 29th of this month and she'll be just a weekend road trip away but we definitely won't be able to see each other every month I'm sure. Becks already moved to NH but that's only an hour away so it's notsobad. My boy Mikey has joined the navy and I believe is going to basic in February..not sure where yet but not close enough. And last night I found out my lovah is moving to Florida. I'm sad about everyone that's moving because I'm really close with all of them but at the same time I know they're doing it to better themselves so I am fully supportive. It's just gonna be weird. And with a second job I would've had to cut down on the time I spent with them anyways.

October was a rough month on the whole..found out some bullshit about my cousin's ex fiancee and now want to kill him. one of my other best friends was in a car accident & for a few days we didn't know if he was going to live a full life again or be paralyzed. and just some other personal things that went on with me. I started having breathing issues and thought it was my asthma, but it now looks to have been anxiety causing near panic attacks. and what I learned last time I had a panic attack is that another would likely kill me because I pass out from them and am high risk for having an asthma attack while passed out. so I've been put on kolonopins as needed, and started seeing a pulmonologist to rule out anything asthma / pulmonary related.
November was a better month until the end. Thanksgiving week I was a wreck and a half. found out my gram has cancer and I couldn't handle it, I just fell apart. We're very close, and her alzheimer's was bad enough I thought and then this added to it. She has spindle cell carcenoma (rare, agressive form) and at this point the only hope is a masectomy. if she has a lambectomy to remove the tumor she'll need radiation which means they'd have to further operate to move her pacemaker, and at 76 that's a terrible idea. so we came to the decision of having the masectomy..after Christmas sometime.

I had a huuuge attitude shift the week after Thanksgiving. I really felt like I hadn't been my true self as much as I thought I had and have been letting go of a lot of things. I don't quite know how to describe it, but I've been a lot happier on the whole and better able to roll with the punches. I also realized that life is short and as much as I said it before, I didn't actually feel like I was living it to the fullest. so I'm working on that.

I'm sure I'll have a photo update at one point, but I haven't had a working camera since June so I'm relying on others' for recent photos of myself. Need to buy a new cam, probably after Christmas when there's better sales.

Back to work for me..just felt like I should update this although I'm sure no one reads it heh.

Saturday, August 23rd, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:this is just great.
Time:5:00 pm.
Mood: discontent.
I have tendonitis and/or scar tissue in my knee and that's what's been causing me so much pain. it got so bad on Thursday that after work I went to the on-call doctor and I was hurting so badly that my blood pressure was 30+ points higher than it should have been and I had a fever of 100.3. the doc prescribed me a strong ass anti-inflammatory. usually you have to take 2 pills every 6 hours when it comes to anti-inflammatory pills but this is so strong you take 2 in the morning and it last the whole day.
today being the second day I've taken them, I discovered this fucks with my stomach. even though I took them with food I've been dry heaving all day with no signs of relief in sight. At least when you're stomach is ill you can usually throw up and you feel better..this is endless. and the worst.
I went down the cape still because I knew if I didn't eat I wouldn't make myself anything at home and I needed more food in my stomach. It seems to have taken the heaving down a notch but it's still pretty consistent. awesome.


oh, and did I mention my surgeon has strongly recommended I get a cortizone shot for my knee? yeaah. I get evaluated for that on Monday and if I need it he'll administer it then. not looking forward to that.

Tuesday, August 19th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:yeah, so..
Time:9:03 pm.
Mood: groggy.
I took my long overdue pulmonary (asthma) test today at the doctor's. Turns out I have "severe severe asthma". That kinda sucks. Thankfully my friends love me enough that they will no longer smoke in my prescence, and now I'm on advair 500 which is like quadruple the dosage of the flovent that's how bad my test showed I guess. She wanted to refer me to a pulmonologist but I have to go in on the 7th of October to get a vaccine so we're just gonna see how the advair works and re-do the pulmonary test then.

And now since my knee started bothering me again (prob a good thing since I see the knee surgeon tomororw) I took some vics and need to pass the fuck out.


laters.

Sunday, August 17th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:8:03 pm.
Mood: cheerful.
Went to the first concert I'd been to in about 3 years (seeing as it was my first concert after turning 21)...Mayhem Festival. Jon and Johnny came with and it was so much fun. I wanted to be a part of the pits unfolding all around, especially for Machine Head but I'll have to wait until I've really strengthened my knee again. Until then I play the safe girly route and just sit on the sidelines wanting to bust heads. At any rate, it was a blast.

It makes me sad that my camera is still in need of a new battery because I realized that the summer is almost over and I have only a handful of pictures from it. Not like it was the best summer ever, but I want to document my life and I haven't been able to. Sucks and part of it is my own procrastinating and not going online and buying a battery yet. For now I have my brother's bulky older camera that works fine but is a pain in the ass cos it's bigger than I'm used to using.

My next couple of weekends are looking to be fabulous. Parties, family stuff, hopefully lots of tanning on my part (I'm still determined to have a tan by the end of this month!).

Work's still awesome except I had to miss hours a couple days because one of the tendons in my knee was bothering me and they think it might be tendonitis. Alonzo took me to the ER friday after I left work and that's what they're telling me they think it is at least so we'll go with it. I have an appointment on Wednesday with my knee surgeon to do some more investigating although it figures that since we went to the hospital it hasn't bothered me as much. Oh well..that's a good thing.


Now it's time to go up to JD's for the dark knight and then we're watching the roast of bob saget. I just hope I can handle the dark knight..alonzo said his cronies are gonna freak me the fuck out most likely. yikes.

xoxox

Tuesday, August 5th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:birthdayy.
Time:6:31 pm.
Mood: determined.
officially 23 as of 10:45 yesterday <33 it.


I had a pretty badass weekend and great birth-day. Unfortunately there will be no pictures because of the about 10 people at my dinner last night none of us could figure how to work my brother's camera and by the time we did, the batteries were dying. The same thing happened Saturday night with it. Apparently I was destined not to have any photos taken of my birthday weekend and day; oh well.

I also discovered that for a camera that's only a year old the only way I can get a new battery for it is online. Laaame. Now I just have to find the manual and make sure I have the exact model number and shit so I can get on that.


Since 23 is going to kick any other years' ass, I might as well start by making some changes. So tonight instead of talking about how I'm going to clean my room I'm actually going to do it..in a big fucking way. I already took "before" pictures so after tonight I'm hoping to be able to at least take one or two "after" pictures. That's my goal at least, is to get one half of my room done.

Also I'm keeping it low key this entire week. I need to seriously slow down. Having my own place again is key. Because I can't have anyone over here pretty much, I end up going to see them. Every night of the week pretty much I hang out with a different person, and always have to go out or drive at least 20 minutes away. Mainly the room thing is what's keeping me focused on staying home this week, but I'm going to really try and not always be running around every night of the week. My wallet suffers, and my family does too because I'm never here anymore. I just sleep here some nights and that's about it..I miss em.


On that note it's time to get this night kicked off and eat something so I can have the energy to clean ha.

Tuesday, July 29th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:finafuckinglly.
Time:12:23 am.
Mood: aggravated.
today is over at long ass last.


pretty much from start to finish it was terrible; at one point I was so pissed off from built up frustration that I wished to be rear ended so I could legit go off on someone.



uggh. tomorrow has to be better; and as of tomorrow my birthday is less than a week away.


glad I've decided to make this weekend and my birthday night hard liquor only nights..I'm gonna need it if every day this week is even half as shitty as today was.

Sunday, July 27th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:haven't updated in forever so here goes..
Time:8:19 pm.
Mood: happy.
Been crazy busy lately. I have to start updating this thing more often because trying to lump everything that's been happening in my life into one entry just isn't gonna work.

My camera's been out of commission since the end of June I think it was and I just haven't bought a new battery so I don't even have any real recent pics.

Work has been awesome; the company I was temping for decided to buy me out of my contract with the temp agency like 3 months before it was up. I've been there almost two months now and I can't believe it, it flew by so fast. I like everyone I work with, the job that I do is easy and keeps me busy so the days fly by too. Not to mention at totally random bebe interviewed at my company and I put in a good word for her and they hired her! Tres exciting.

My life in general has just been on a total turnaround where everything is going great with everyone in my life. I just have to start slowing down and taking it easy though because I feel like I'm constantly running around and my room is suffering for it; plus I hardly ever see my family. But it feels great hanging out with everyone on a regular basis; my friends are addicting heheh.

I guess that's about all for now; time to watch some old school wrestling at Dave's.


xoxox.

Wednesday, July 2nd, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:11:33 pm.
Mood: grateful.
My life is pretty fucking awesome.

new job = awesome.
not having to worry about money, and paying back my parents = awesome.
having my aunt's house this week = awesome.
my friends = awesome.
kidnapping my puppy love for a few days while i'm here = awesome.



i need to start taking more pictures too cos i'm happy and want photographic evidence heheh.


i'll elaborate later (hopefully when i have pics too), but for now i gotta go to sleep because i felt like i was gonna pass out all day yesterday and while it seems to have passed i want to get my rest in to make sure. plus i gotta rest up for the weekend, i'm sure not a lot of sleep will be had :-)

Friday, May 30th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:4:12 pm.
Mood: excited.
i fucking love karma.


i was having the woorst day and was on the fucking war path all day. lots of things building up and all amounting to shit.

now..if i could i would still kill the person i'd like to cos he deserves to die viciously, slowly, painfully, and by my hands..but forget him for now.


within a 15 minute time span i got two of the best calls like ever.

1. my lawyer in my slip & fall accident from last year informed me they're looking to settle. sweeetass.

2. i got the job that i just interviewed for yesterday and i start monday!



can you say fuck yeah?!

i'm sort of loving life at the moment.

::basking in glory::

Thursday, May 15th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:who is this irresistable creature who has an insatiable love for the dead?
Time:5:37 pm.
pppppppicture update.

Read more...Collapse )

Thursday, May 8th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:1:34 pm.
Mood: annoyed.
ugh.


i need a job, hardcore.


just found out that since I was on unemployment prior to being laid off I only have one more week of an unemployment check and the nada. awesome.


I've signed up with like 5 temp agencies but none of them have called with opportunities yet..they said it's been slow. soo I'm probably gonna apply at the hotel because money is money and even a part time paycheck is better than nothing.

Thursday, May 1st, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:7:02 pm.
Mood: hungry.
well.

it's been awhile and I'll have a photo update sometime in the near future but here's the lowdown.

- road trip / family vacation was last week and we got home late Friday night. went to various places in Pennsylvania, Atlantic City NJ, Six Flags NJ, and NYC. my knee held up pretty well considering the amount of walking and the fact that it hasn't even been 3 months since my surgery. yay high pain tolerance. it was a fun time although stressful (but what family vacation isn't?) and it was good to spend quality time with them since I treat our house like a hotel more often than not.

- work. or lack thereof. got hired April 7th, worked a couple of weeks, went on vacation and came back to find out that all of our jobs had been "eliminated" because the company decided to outsource. soo now everyone is out of a job and it's back to the drawing board. at least this time around i don't have to worry about my knee being a hinderance at interviews and such but i was really looking forward to working again and the company // people seemed great. not to mention it was a 5 minute commute..literally. le sigh.

- this week. has been pretty great considering i was laid off on monday. i unexpectedly became available to house // dog sit for my aunt so i'm making a little money and get to have the house to myself. well, when alonzo's not keeping me company which so far would be just last night. becauusee last night my danny took me to the sox game! heheh. second game ever, saw daisuke pitch again, only this time I also got to see my husband papelbon pitch too <33
also i hate toronto cos they're so good and it was great to beat them. especially in a 9th inning rbi.


so while things aren't going the best ever it's not terrible either. i ended up with the feeling of having my own apartment again (except i have a 52in tv screen haha) that i'm getting paid for, and i got to see my boys play again for what will definitely not be the last time this season.

this weekend is gonna be killa, IronMan tomorrow and then alll sorts of good happenings cos it's his birthday weekend.

I'll have pics up soon from my vacation, the game, and probably this weekend.

xoxox

Friday, April 4th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:um, I love my life.
Time:8:00 pm.
Mood: devious.
I have a job!!!

I'm way psyched to be working at the same place as bebe, getting paid a goood amount of money, finally having a weekly instead of bi-weekly paycheck and finding a place that also doesn't care about piercings.

I didn't even have to look for it either hah. I mentioned to bebe I was gonna start looking for a job and she referred me for this one. Can't wait to start :)


I no longer have to wear my knee brace either..as of Tuesday. I thought it was an April fool's day joke when my PT trainer told me that but it was true heh. I will however wear it this coming Thursday for my comeback at the pub. I figure drinking will make me more susceptible to falling..especially since I haven't been drunk since January.

Last night I hung out with my Danny for the first time in almost two months. I missed him so.

I'm gonna train myself to wake up at 8 this weekend so I'll be used to it come Monday when I have to be at work by 9. Which by the way, I have the best commute..less than a ten minute drive when traffic is good. can you say saweet? lol.


Well my daddy just got home so I gotta tell him the great news and then I'm off to Jon's to be with him and Kali for the night.


xoxox

Monday, March 10th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:faantastic.
Time:1:08 am.
So since Wednesday (awesome a day as that was in itself) things have only gotten better.

Thursday I hung out with Gareth for the first time in ages and took a bone cruise in his hot ass mustang heh. I generally hate fords but his is too nice to not like.

Friday I had to drop off my car loan and on the way back drove around aimlessly and who did I find but Johnny. hoorah. Hopefully we'll start hanging out on the somewhat regular now that he has a cell phone and myspace so communication shouldn't be a problem like it's always been.
That night I finally got up to Quincy to get my camera back and hang out with Jon and Kali (his rottie). Somehow I stayed til 4:30 when I started yawning at 11 I figured I would've fallen asleep but I didn't crash til I got home.

Saturday was a typical rainy day of not doing a damn thing.

And today I hung out with dave, hung out with my bodyguard, watched a bunch of movies, got that new Neutrogena wave thing at Target, showered and ordered my new phone:

Photobucket

I should have it by Wednesday. I wanted a keyboard phone so hopefully I'll be happy with this one. I originally wanted the red blackberry world something or other one but I found out that I would have to pay an additional $30 a month and that it wasn't available as an upgrade for my "new every two" deal. So the Alias it is.

I have a busy day tomorrow so time to take the Nyquil and pass the hell out. Sleep = key.

xoxox

Wednesday, March 5th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Subject:I'd be dancing if I could.
Time:11:33 pm.
Mood:fierce.
++ I'm down to just one crutch nowadays. Notsomuch pain anymore either.

++ My physical therapist is continually impressed with my progress each time he sees me. the real test will be my second post-op next week but I'm not worried.

+++ I just started driving again. Helloooo Freeedooom!!!

++ I feel loved by oh so many people. And now that people have heard I can drive again, they're coming out of the woodwork. fuck yes (and I totally understand why they didn't come visit, the fact they've been checking in all along means just as much to me).

+++ My boy Christian won Project Runway tonight. Dave was scared at how happy that made me.


this all = my life looking up 110% literally every day.

Wednesday, February 20th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:1:22 am.
Mood: blah.
ok I'm bored with this. At least with physical therapy starting Thursday I'll be getting out of the house at least once if not twice a week.

My Danny & Jon visited me Sunday which was a treat especially cos I hadn't seen Danny since my surgery. Gotta love best friends. Last week was no doubt a good one, this one has been uneventful thus far. Dad and Tyler are both on vacation so that's nice, but no one's really been around much so I'm still bored more times than not.

I am slowly getting mom into Nip // Tuck with me though so that's pretty cool.

uuum. yeah, that's it.

xoxox

Thursday, February 14th, 2008

(rock the cock)

Time:9:33 pm.
Mood: loved.
Well, I am alive. And just had the best day ever..well, probably the best one so far this year at least :D

Surgery went well..had my post-op today and the doctor says I'm healing pretty quickly. I start physical therapy next Thursday and the goal for now is to be walking (even if it is a zombie walk) by about this time next month. I still won't really be going out until I've fully healed because the last thing I need to do is fuck it up and I have a habit of doing such ha.

Then I came home and the lovely Miss Leah paid me a visit, complete with Valentine's day flowers! So unexpected and very cute. Gram stopped in with some chocolates and a card, and Jon came by later with chocolate and this month's cosomopolitan heh. Then daddy came home with chinese food and roses for me!

So now I have three vases of flowers, one a mix of what Jon and dad gave me as get well flowers and then the other two are my valentine's day flowers from today.

I was starting to feel disconnected from almost everyone so it was perfect timing. Not to mention that I got out of the house for the first time in over a week and it was a pretty nice day for it as well.

It's been definitely a great day and I was so happy to have the company of a couple of my best friends <33 oh, and Shane who was one of my valentine's again this year heheh. love him.

I figure it'll be about April before I'm completely recovered which is good timing because I got a tip on a job where they aren't looking for anyone until April anyways and it will be much nicer weather by then on the regular. I can't wait to walk again, plus see all my friends cos as much as I love them all only certain ones can come to my house really.

Here I thought today would be just another boring day, but it turned out to be what I'm pretty sure is the best of the year so far. It was fantastic :D

xoxox

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